Let Your "No" Be No

Ella is going through the ever-so-typical phase where she says, "No!" to everything while shaking her head vigorously, even to pizza. Of course, she means, "Oh, baby... Yes!" But it still comes out, "No." We'll work on our honesty a little later. For now, I think it's just a matter of expressing independence and using a word she knows.

Change of Plans

Yesterday we received a call telling us that the medical staff wanted to give us an update on what's going on. We knew what that meant. A few minutes later, our hypothesis was confirmed. We aren't going overseas.

DeLaynie has been placed at the mildest end of the autism spectrum. (Autism spectrum disorder is different from autism proper, in case you're planning on checking out on Wikipedia. You should know, however, than none of the medical sites' descriptions of children with this disorder remotely fit DeLaynie.) The medical staff doesn't want to send her to a place where another language is spoken for a portion of the day because they're afraid that will confuse her as she tries to learn English. I guess New York City, Los Angeles, and most of Texas are out of the question, then, huh?

Now, before you get all worried and spiritually burdened, you should know that I'm doing just fine. Really. People here at the training center don't seem to believe me. But at this point, it's helpful to know that we are called to serve in the United States. We had been looking at countries all over the planet, hoping to find a fit somewhere other than here, but this definitely narrows the options.

For us, staying is a sacrifice. It's the sacrifice that we've been called to lay down at the feet of Jesus, and it will be.

Don't get it in your head that I'm being super-spiritual about the situation. I really want to go, and I'm plenty unhappy that we aren't. But we aren't. We know that God's sovereignty doesn't have a glitch in it. We know that His goodness is abundant. We know that He is our portion and our good. For now, He's going to be our portion and our good in this country. We're hoping that when DeLaynie has progressed to an age appropriate level, we may return to the possibility of overseas ministry.

We should mention that we're hoping to go west (young man), where churches are dramatically less numerous than they are in the southeast. Plus, I would love to get some seminary under my pink, rhinestone-laden belt, and I really like Golden Gate, a seminary made up of five campuses spread out over the west.

For now, we have no firm plans. The next step is to see Edwin's brother, and then we head to Alabama, where we have a furnished mission house waiting on us, by the grace of God and His provision. We will serve where needed, and follow the path that God will, most assuredly, make straight under our feet, as He has to this point.

The Persecuted Church

I had a hard time deciding what to write about tonight. For whatever reason, I rarely write about the classes we attend during the day. Today is an exception, however. We heard from a man who focuses on the persecuted Christians in our world. He told us what our brothers and sisters in Christ are enduring in other countries. Some suffer because of their government. Others suffer at the hands of their families.

We heard about pastors who spent decades in prison, being led to believe that their wives had divorced them and their children denied them. We heard about women beaten by their fathers for denouncing their faith of Islam in order to turn to Jesus. We heard about the Christians who were forced to keep their house churches secret for fear of having their children taken from them or imprisonment in reeducation camps, but who vowed to wake up an hour earlier everyday to pray for their brothers and sisters in other countries when they discovered that there were others enduring persecution more severe than they. They persevered through pain, imprisonment, and, worst of all, the suffering of their own, precious children.

As we walked to lunch, we talked about the faith of these saints. We discussed the ways that it differs from North American Christianity, and how there really should be another name for their faith, or for ours. We shouldn't have the privilege to go by the same name that they carry with such joy and perseverance. We, who complain when there aren't enough programs for our children or when the pews are too hard, cannot possibly be put in the same category as they, can we?

Then we asked the question, "Who are we to go to them?" Is this really the Christianity that we want to export to other countries? Is this the faith that we pray for the unbelieving to discover, the me-centered desire for God to serve us?

Of course, it's better that we go. It's better for them to hear than to endure Hell, even if the idea of church has been mutilated in the minds of the sent-out ones. Let's get one thing straight: I love the church of the United States. I love that you can find a church almost anywhere. I love that there are believers all over this great country. I love that we are free to worship. But are we using that freedom, or are we abusing it? Do we really get to know God for who He is as we sit on our padded seats, silently grumbling about the preacher going to long? And even as we sit, our brothers and sisters in other countries are desperately hoping and praying that someone in their congregation could get their hands on a Bible. Is our Christianity the family that God had allowed His Son to die for?

I'm wrestling with these questions tonight. I hope we continue to wrestle. If there's anything that this country needs, it's to learn that North American Christianity may be the least punished, but we may also be the least free. For freedom only exists when it's exercised.

The Long, Lost Blogger

So, we are actually here, and alive. We're still at the training facility in Virginia. Here are some pictures, though they're meant to give you pictures of my kids, not to show off my photography skills.

Aweee. These kids love to hug. At least, DeLaynie does. Ella just puts up with it.

DeLaynie has discovered the monkey bars. At first, she was tentative about it, but now

she loves it.

Ella enjoys the slide,

But is a bit confused by the sandbox.

I know that you've been desperately waiting to see it, so here it is! The bag. That I made. I have a friend that made me a bag, and it was much more detailed and sturdy. But I made this one. And stuff goes in, and doesn't fall out the bottom. Thus, it is a success.

Still Alive

Hi all! I'm sorry that I've missed three days this week of posting. It isn't a sign that things are bad. No. The internet is down here at the training center. I'm using a public computer right now. I just wanted to let you all know that we're doing just fine, and that I'll start regular posting again once the internet is back up and running. I have some pictures that I want you to see. Some of the girls, and one of that bag that I made :)!

Stress Relief

I think that it's pretty obvious that this week has been stressful. I almost always blog Monday through Saturday, but this week I missed one. We still don't know anything for sure, except that we're tired and stressed out. There are a few ways to relieve stress. My choice is crafting.

I mentioned in this post that there is a quilting quad here on campus. In it, there are a myriad of sewing machines, a team of quilting women, and an array of fabric that could dizzy almost anyone. They have these really cute bags (purses/totes) hanging up that look tempting, but I just didn't have it in me to give it a go. The stress of the week, however, has changed my mind. I went to the quilting quad today.

I haven't finished my bag yet. I do have an idea of what the finished product is going to look like, though. I'm pretty proud of my choice in fabric. After that, it was all downhill. I can't sew in a straight line. I'm good with it. It isn't going to be Vera Bradley, but it will hold stuff. My goal is that I'll be able to put things in it without those things falling through the bottom. We'll see how that goes.

After all, the point was stress relief, not perfection. Which is good. Stress may be relieved, but perfection is nowhere to be found.

Whew!

I know that you're all (both of you) wondering what happened yesterday with DeLaynie. Unfortunately, we're still just not sure. DeLaynie had a test today called a sleep deprived EEG. It sounds just as bad as it is, at least on the parents. The actual procedure looks quite similar to some form of mideival torture, though DeLaynie slept through a vast majority of it. What it came down to it that we had to keep her up three hours late, get her up three hours early, and give her a very mild sedative to make sure that she would sleep while the very nice technician stuck electrodes all over our baby's skull.



Rabbit trail: So, what do you do with a three year old at 4:15 in the morning? Edwin woke her up by asking if she wanted to go to the playground. She perked up instantly. Unfortunately, it was crazy cold this morning. After a few minutes on the swing, Edwin heard her teeth chattering, and decided to take her to the van and watch a movie on the portable dvd player. They stayed there until one of the buildings on campus was opened, and then they hung out inside and talked to random passers by. That's what you do with a three year old at 4:15 (until 6:45) in the morning.



We had to put her in the papoose (think: giant swaddling blanket) so she wouldn't squirm. It made for a pretty grotesque sight, but it was painless on her.



This test had the purpose of making sure that there isn't anything going on with her actual brain, which may be easy to fix or correct with therapy. The doctor hasn't actually seen the results yet, so we don't know how that test came out. There's also the possibility of an MRI. They don't think anything is really wrong with her brain, but they want to be on the safe side.



Everything is still fuzzy for right now. We're tired, but we're doing fine emotionally. DeLaynie's completely exhausted, as is Ella. Neither of them are aware that anything is wrong, accept for an interesting detour in our family's sleeping patterns. All-in-all, we're okay. Pooped, but okay. There's absolutely nothing pointing to a medical problem with DeLaynie, other than this developmental delay. Someone from the practice will be observing her while she's at school tomorrow, so be praying that DeLaynie shows herself for who she really is. She tends to act differently in school than she does everywhere else, so please pray that she will be able to be the wonderful, sweet-spirited, vivacious child that we know her to be.