I decided that it may be a good idea to explain something. It may seem like I bring up my weaknesses a lot. I have tons, way more than I have mentioned, or even could if I tried. It's not that I don't like me. I do, actually. I have several reasons for why I talk about the more annoying and obvious inadequacies that I have.
First, I want people to know that I know that they're there. If you hang out with me, even for just a few minutes, you will experience at least one of my less attractive qualities. I tell new people in my life that I'm not great socially. And it's true, I'm not. I'm not as bad as I used to be, and I hope to continue improving. I want people to know that I'm aware of these things, and that I'm trying.
Secondly, I don't want anyone to think that I believe myself to be infallible. I talk about parenting, politics, and theology quite a bit, and I want those who read what I write to be absolutely sure that I don't think of myself as beyond criticism. I'm going to be wrong, and it's fine by me for you to think so, and even comment about it.
Finally, and most importantly, I boast in my weaknesses because it just isn't about me. Make no mistake, I'm about the most human human you're going to find. I will point to my weaknesses with the prayer that Christ will cover them up with His power. If you read nothing else, know this: It's about Jesus. What I do well is because of Jesus. When I fall, that's just what I am poking through. But He has covered it with His own precious blood, and it is paid for. I cling to the promise that He isn't finished with me yet. When I see Him face to face, I, along with the rest of His Church, will be purified, ready to meet my Groom.
My God is big, really big. As big as my sin is, and as big as my inadequacies are, He is bigger. He is still in control. So when I say that I'm not a good housekeeper, or that I can talk more than I should about things that have little spiritual value, like calorie counting, I'm just making sure that you know, as well as reminding myself, that I am weak, but He is strong.
An Education of the Wild Yeasts.
6 days ago